lololol

Silent Treatment

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each
other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day,
he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,
"Please wake me at 5:00 AM " He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM
and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and
see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by
the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.


WIFE VS. HUSBAND

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and
neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"
"Yep," the wife replied , "in-laws


WOMEN'S REVENGE
"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.
As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.
"So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked.
"No," she replied, " but my husband refused to come shopping with me,
and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally."




UNDERSTANDING WOMEN
(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)
I know I'm! not going to understand women.
I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax,
pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root,
and still be afraid of a spider.

W O R D S
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day...
30,000 to a man's 15,000.
The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men...
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"

CREATION
A man said t o his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be
so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.
" The wife responded, "Allow me to explain.
God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!

WHO DOES WHAT
A man and his wife were having an argument about who
should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first,
and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."
The husband said, " You are in charge of cooking around here and
you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."
Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible
that the man should do the coffee."
Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me."
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament
and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says.........."HEBREWS"

God may have created man before woman,
but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.

Little Britain and catherine tate

i little britain and catherine tate
here is the words to an episode of lou and andy
its declans birthday card
Tom baker: Since cigarette-smoking has become mandaroty, newsagents in Britain have flourished.
Lou: right now you know its Declan's birthday coming up?
Andy: Who?
Lou: declan your brother
andy: yeahiknow
Lou: its his birthday coming up and you got to get him a card. now, can you see any you like?
Andy : I want that one
Lou: That one?
Andy: yeah
Lou: but it says with deepest sympathy
Andy: yeahiknow
Lou: but thats what you send someone when somebodys died
Andy: i want that one
Lou:Well, I'm not sure Declan's gonna like that: it's gonna send out the wrong message. Now, Declan likes sailing boats, why don't we get one with sailing boats on it?
Andy: i want that one
Lou: this one's got sailing boats he likes sailing boats
Andy:
THAT
ONE
Lou: are you sure this is the card you wanna send to your brother Declan?
Andy: Yeah Yeah Yeah
..
..
..
Andy: it his birthday hes not dead!!!!

Jackson 5 song eastenders version i want u back

TIFFANY!
LIAM!
WHITNEY!
MORGAN!
when i had you to myself
i dint want you around
those pretty faces always made ya
stand out in the crowd
then someone picked you from the bunch
one glance was all it took
now its much too late for me
to take a second look
oh baby give me one more chance
to show you that i love you
wont you please let me
back in your 'eart
oh darling i was blind
to let you go
but now since i see you in her arms
i want you back yes i do now
i want you back yoo hoo baby

kl song i love it and ermm
i love jackson 5
Whitney Dean played by Shona McGarty
Biana Jackson played by Patsy Palmer
Tiffany Dean played by Maisie Smith
Morgan Jackson King played by Devon Higgs
Liam Butcher played by ermm oh yeah James Forde

Go Aled Go Laura

Laura Williams, 18 and Aled i dont know how old
Laura became the worlds youngest mum to give birth to conjoined twins
the twins were called Hope and Faith
ere is a pic i found ( if it uploads)
Crap it wont upload
copy paste and look at this link:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/telegraph/multimedia/archive/01125/conjoined-twins_11_1125692c.jpg
and anyway
Unfortunately after the decision of getting them seperated Hope was Stable but faith was a bit so so but then Hope's health went down and doctors asked Laura and Aled if they could turn off life support for Hope. Aled later said that he'd rather let her go in peace than the doctors resucitating her and it being unsuccesful But faith the other twin stayed strong for a whole month. instead of tightening the skin straight away where she had been seperated from her sister they thought it best to leave it for a while.
unfortunately even though little Hope Managed 6 days Little Faith died after a month.
R.i.p Hope and Faith
never forgotten
well done Aled and Laura for staying strong and just to answer questions they didnt have an abortion because Laura didnt beleive in them neither did Aled i too think abortions are foul if you dont want a child dont get pregnant Why would you kill your own flesh and blood.
and again
rest in peace Hope and Faith